I am a Patriot (Sorry Not Sorry)

It's the Fourth of July. It's an important day for me.
So is Memorial Day. And Veteran's Day. And Welcome Home Vietnam Veterans Day. And Patriot Day.
And so are a bunch of other related holidays, and the other 360 days not in the above list.
Because I love my country.
That's not in vogue. Hell, it's not even popular. Honestly, it's actively discouraged in today's world.
And that is broken.
I'm proud to be an American.
I can't take credit for it – It's not like I got to choose my parents or where or when I was born or on what soil or when in the timeline, or any of the things that made me an American.
But I can do something with it.
For me, patriotism is a responsibility. It's a set of attitudes and actions that live out the ideals of everything that make my country great. (I do claim it. I don't minimize or disavow it.)
The ideals. The "what it should be."
Not jingoism. Not fascism. Not a host of other labels people will use to intentionally devalue and deconstruct and destroy something that could make the world better.
It's not, "I'm OK, you're OK, so we're all OK."
As we traipse along in our little isolationist bubbles of selfishness, corporate betterment be damned.
No, it's, "I'm not OK. You're not OK. And that's OK."
Not not in a "let's settle and wallow in our broken bubbles of selfishness, because – hey – everyone's broken."
And it's not embracing the worldwide in vogue societal lie that each of us are even independent islands of awesome that are entitled to do what we want (bigger values and norms be damned).
We are are a social, deeply dependent species that is better when we come together to live for ideals and overcome our individual brokenness to make something bigger and better and healthier than we can by ourselves.
Patriotism is a very important avenue for that.
That's not to say we don't occasionally come together; we do. Often at times of horrible tragedy.
Columbine and Sandy Hook. 9/11 and Orlando.
Things I think about and have a tightening in my chest and a helpless sorrow and physical desire to huddle in my home holding my family for eternity.
But amazing things happen in those times of tragedy.
And so do amazingly fractured, broken things, as people line up in solidarity across dividing lines that often become more about marginalizing opposition (the horrific irony), rather than doing everything we can to stave off the encroaching downward darkness spiral with those pools of light of acts of service and sacrifice that are those good islands of hope to which we so desperately cling.
But thank God those things do happen.
In the wake of giant tragedy, as I try to go through what I can find out about each of the victims, and directly and splash damage impacted people, in what could be a horrifically sink-hole of sadness, there are these brilliant, stabbingly bright lights of heroism, some big, and so many non-spotlighted and never making it above the fold.
It's not like living ideals – any ideals – is easy.
To be ramble-y for moment, the only good example of any of this is me, because that's the sample set of one with which I am 100% aware. (Ish.)
And I'm one uneven, inconsistent, perpetually emotionally 14-year-old example. I'm snarky and passionate and high-handed and inappropriate and rallying and divisive and loyal and turncoat and loving and selfish so much more.
(Which any of you who follow my too-involved online presencie have a vague sense of – and be thankful you don't have the additional insight of living in my skull.)
But even if I don't have it all figured out, I do have the awareness – or sometimes just a sense – of ideals that might lift me and people around me up. If even a little bit.
Patriotism gives a container for a decent chunk of ideals.
Sure, the history is messy and there are so many dark milestones on the way that I can't whitewash or grotesquely minimize with a version of, "Hey, that wasn't me that did that."
But I'm talking about the ideals. The "if I I figure out some version of living out this one thing, the world is a better place. And if I can also live out some version of this other one that I think will make the world better place. Oh, and this one...."
And owning it. Owning those ideals are wrapped in a country-specific wrapper that isn't that country-specific, because these are borne from desperate desire to hold onto human values, irrespective of country borders.
And not being milktoast about. It's digging in my heels and saying, "No! This, this Value – This matters.
This is worth doing the hard work and fighting for."
Living this:

"We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal; that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights; that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."

Living this:

"We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America."

****ing living this:

"Not like the brazen giant of Greek fame,With conquering limbs astride from land to land;Here at our sea-washed, sunset gates shall standA mighty woman with a torch, whose flameIs the imprisoned lightning, and her nameMother of Exiles. From her beacon-handGlows world-wide welcome; her mild eyes commandThe air-bridged harbor that twin cities frame."'Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!' cries sheWith silent lips. 'Give me your tired, your poor,Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me,I lift my lamp beside the golden door!'"

Happy Fourth of July. Happy Independence Day.
Whether you live in that country's borders or not.
God Bless America.
(Unashamed.)

"The Encouragement Clown" (A Milkshake Boom Production)

This weekend, I unexpectedly got to be part of something pretty great, as I took on a last-minute lead role in a project with a solid group of Austin creatives.

"The Encouragement Clown" is an upcoming short film from The Milkshake Boom crew, HQed in Austin, Texas.

Writer / Director Robert James Haynes ("The Spell Book") and DP Christine Carstairs ("Drastic Measures"), are an amazing creative duo, and I get the sense really talented folks gravitate toward them.

Actors Dan Rep, Jose V. Rivera, and Robin Kauffman (who pulled double duty with makeup), Boom Operator Dylan Santurri, Sound Technician and Grip Scott Osborn, and 2nd AD Lindsay Young helped build a fun, low-pressure, high-energy, single-day shoot.

It was humbling to be included by such a great group of creatives, I'm looking forward to the film showing well (I generally don't watch myself, so y'all will have to tell me how it is), and you can get some behind-the-scenes photos from Christine here.

Perspective

 Today could be looked at as a bit of a rough day.

Multiple kicks to the teeth. Usually getting some lip, too.

Except:

1. Let's face it: Everything is gravy.
   
   All. Of. The. Everythings.
   
   (Gravy.)
   
   
2. I got one of those unlooked-for, unexpected, beautiful moments validating what I do has meaning and makes some things better.
   
   Not All of the Everythings. But some of the every things.
   
   (And, honestly, I don't do it for that. So it's extra nice when unexpected validation stops by to say "hi" and hug my fuzzy insides.)

What it means to be smart

I know a lot of super intelligent people who are idiots.

Heck, I act like an idiot a lot of the time.

Smart -- really smart -- is an aggregate of a bunch of things:

• Intelligence -- Aptitude to get knowledge
• Knowledge -- To simplify, let's just say it's information
• Wisdom -- Doing something appropriate with knowledge
• Action -- Acting on wisdom

It  takes all of this to be "smart" -- The aptitude to get tons of information, the tons of information, the wherewithal to know when/not (and how/not) to use that information, and the compulsion do something with that great power and responsibility.

I know hyper-intelligent people who are lazy. They are not smart.

I know people with tons of information who use it in useless ways, or in abusive ways, or are just generally an ass about what they think they know. They are not smart.

I know people who have the ability to change their world at a micro or macro level, but don't have the compulsion to do anything. At all. They are not smart.

And I'm not just talking about pervasive character flaws -- I'm talking about what people like me do, off and on, throughout our lives. Heck -- throughout my day.

And then there's a flaw we all have, where we think we're smarter than we really are.

Sure, intellectually, I know there's a bunch of someones out there that are smarter than me. But if that doesn't live with me, it's just intellectual knowledge that doesn't lead to personal growth.

And I'm talking about acknowledging there are smarter people in a healthy way, not in a "I'm not worth anything", false negative sense of my worth.

I surround myself with peers and mentors that I meet with on a weekly, monthly, and quarterly basis. We encourage and lift each other up and hold each other accountable -- which means calling each other out if we're acting arrogant, thinking too much of our gifts and talents, or otherwise behaving selfishly. Often times, that's about how smart we're being (or a false sense of intelligence, or an elitism, or a host of other character flaws or symptoms that indicate being out of whack with the reality of what it means to be smart, and to get smarter.

Here's a bit of litmus test I have (one of them; I have several) -- Do I find myself using the phrase, "Those people" in categorizing a group?

I don't mean just with race -- I mean with differing religious or political views, or people without domain expertise, or with people who say something that could be classified as "dumb" because they haven't had the exposure to the knowledge before.

(And while I could arguably add a fifth ingredient to "smart" -- "Opportunity" -- I'd argue there is so much information exposed to us wherever we are that we can't reach saturation. Again. Arguably.)

With myself and other "smart" people, I've heard versions of the phrase "those people" used. Not Smart.

When I look at the twelve smartest people I know, they're not just smart in aggregate -- They higher in Intelligence, AND Knowledge, AND Wisdom, AND Action. And eight of those twelve don't even have higher education degrees.

(And no, I don't come close to cracking the Smart Twelve.)

Oh, and so I don't forget -- Making sure I don't over value my smarts and/or don't giving people enough grace with theirs doesn't mean I'm a milktoast, and doesn't mean I don't call people out on their dumb crap.

But it means if I do, I better have cleaned up my house, too.

One of my favorite managers in the world used to try to get people to see what they needed to see to do their jobs, get on board with change that was going to happen regardless, and so on.

And if they didn't get there -- with spoonfuls of patient help -- he might ... lose it a bit.

"Do you want me to get some crayons and draw a ****ing map for you?"

He wasn't deriding intelligence, and he wasn't belittling the person -- But he was saying, "You should have been able to get there, and I helped you -- a lot -- and you're still not there. You better get there."

(Fortunately, I never had that phrase used on me. Though I probably deserved to have.)

(Dr. Doom and Data provided by Marvel. © 2014 Marvel)

Celebrating Papa Day

Today is special.

Today is "Papa Day".

Five years ago today, my dad-in-law -- a neat, fun inspiring man -- left this life. It sucked.

Sucks.

I remember him. Often.

And not just the last few weeks and months of his life -- those whirlwind, visceral memories of surprise phone calls and rushed road trips, of moves and the funeral and packing and selling that sometime threaten to take over all of the other memories.

I remember how Dad laughed, how easy-going he was, how patient he was in the middle of inconvenience, discomfort, and pain (we all found out after the fact that he was playing on the floor with the kids "with a horribly sore back" -- that it turned out was actually his spine cracked from the growth of a tumor).

I remember his sense of humor, the self-deprecating-but-not-insecure fun he had at his own expense.

I remember his generosity. That man would tip a waitress in need more than the cost of the meal. And not look back.

Later the day that dad passed, my then-seven-year-old daughter asked if we could remember the day, and celebrate it as "Poppa Day", with all of those good memories.

I promised her I would. And we do.

Tonight was about listening to fifties sock-hop music (could have been polka or Pavarotti, too), dancing around the open-windowed house like goofballs (because it doesn't matter what we look like or what people think of us), and eating horrible sugary baked treats like those he would buy the kids when he visited us.

Why?

Why do all of this stuff that could be called self-medicating, or superficial, or no longer needed?

Kind of like baskets and candy and trinkets at Easter or Christmas, this fun, light-hearted break from routine -- revolving around something more important -- gives all of us a chance to step back, laugh, tear up, be reflective, be goofy, and focus on an example and a legacy that's lasting and outside of ourselves.

At one point tonight, my youngest daughter (a toddler when we lost Dad) stopped eating her white-emblazoned chocolate cupcake, and just stared into space.

Thinking the sugar had won, I asked her what she was thinking about.

"I know Papa was a very good man," she said. And went back to eating her cupcake.

That's why we do Papa Day.

Just ... stop it

Up front: Admittedly, my tolerance for what I consider unimportant is at quite the low.

I'm excitedly and urgently growing my business in a ginormous way, which pretty much consumes me right now. My wife and I are painfully remembering and grieving departed loved ones, and that has us emotionally drained. And I seem to be recently surrounded by friends and acquaintances who are sadly, imminently going to lose family members, so I'm doing what I can physically and emotionally to be there for them, too.

So, there's all of this genuinely important stuff going on in people's lives.

And then there's irritating, destructive noise in my social feeds, where it's just people abusing other people.

Over stupid things.

Like the "debate" over evolution and creation.

Not important.

Don't misunderstand -- I'm not saying the topics aren't important and worth discussing. But this gross noise has not been about the topics. It's been about debating. And it's been about abuse.

So if it's not important, why am I coming out of semi-blog-hiatus to say anything?

Because that abuse is an important thing for us to talk about. And, corporately, to stop.

I look at these social feeds, and think, "Really? You're going to abuse people using broken social pipes as a way to push your world view onto them, and, what -- change them to your mindset?"

Actually, I would be OK with even that.

Except even that's not what's happening.

What is actually happening in is you're using broken social pipes as an avenue to try to appear superior and to abuse people.

You are an arrogant, horrible person.

I have been shocked at the base, intolerant vitriol that's been spewed by people over topics like this. In publicly, archive-able, searchable forms for when I'm considering working with, hiring, or having a beer with you.

Sickly ironically, this vitriol is usually from people that would consider themselves socially progressive intelligent people, and for whom tolerance is a stated cornerstone of their beliefs.

We all have our blind spots, and we smart people often think we're far more intelligent than we really are, and oh, we would like to think we're never intolerant.

Coming back to this recent debate and abuse over theories of how everything came to be, and limiting that to evolution and creationism theories, let me tell you what's true for me:

1. I am well-read and informed concerning these theories
2. I acknowledge both theories take a tremendous amount of faith
3. I have a strong, directed personal conviction on these topics
4. I don't put that personal conviction onto other people
5. I don't think less of them if they disagree (about this, or political views, or best movies)
6. As someone else said, depending on the direction you take, evolution and creation are inherently non-provable and/or non-falsifiable
7. I wasn't there, so I don't know how the whole "everything coming into being" thing went down

So, now you know where I stand. It's discussable.

It's not debatable.

This whole little rambling of mine is just a straw. It's just little contribution for goading maybe a few of us to take our viewpoints out of a non-directed cloud (and aiming it at a public figure with whom you don't have a personal relationship is the same thing as a non-directed cloud, plus maybe a little bit of cowardice).

And this is about taking accountability for our behavior.

Those that know me know I don't brook intolerant vitriolic hate spew. One of the things people like and hate about me is I hold people accountable. Even if I don't know them.

I'm a work in progress, and I certainly haven't arrived, but I work really hard to hold people accountable without penalizing them. I spend a lot of time thinking about it, practicing it, evaluating how I've done with it, and refining it.

So even though I know "I'm not there yet", I'm comfortable that I'm at least actively doing the hard work.

And regardless of your viewpoint, if you know me, do me favor: Take the comments you've been making about [those people] and [that obvious debate], and insert my name. Make it personal. Make it directed. Make it at me.

See if that still works for you.

And if it does, do us a mutual favor and unfriend and unfollow me.

And honestly, all of that intolerant vitriolic hate spew? Just ... stop it.

Straight Up Gate Poppin' ...

My dogs have started Gate Poppin'.

They lean on or head-butt their way past a safety gate or other barrier to get to things they want, but aren't supposed to have.

Things like access to a human's bed (because their muddy paws didn't get clean enough on the floor as they walked through the entire house).

They wait until I'm asleep. Or out of the house. Then they start poppin'.

I've decided, to minimize my rage at this recent behavior, at some point, I'm going to write a rap parody video, "Gate Poppin'", featuring my dogs.

(NSFW Warning. It will use the word "bitches". A lot.)

Here's a possible sample:

Walkin' my domain, my home where I'm the king
trying ta get to bed, but here's the thing
Gotta item blocking my reg'lar path
gotta knock it down -- It's gonna feel my wrath 

Put my head low, then hear some scritchin'
somewhere down south, I start to itchin'
Look up see a bitch on the other side
she don't look calm -- she looks ready to ride 

Heat drivin' me wild, like I'm a junkyard cur
Maybe it's the summer weather, or maybe it's just her
Put my head down with nothin' stoppin'
Me as I lunge forward and start ta poppin'....

[Refrain.]

Tha's right, it's time to get poppin' -- Straight up Gate Poppin' 

Poppin'. Puh-Puh-Puh-Pop-Poppin'

Poppin'. Pop-Pop-Pop-Poppin'

Poppin'. Pop-Pop-Pop-Poppin'

Pop-Pop-Pop. Pope-puh-pop-pop-pop-POP!

(Straight up Gate Poppin')

(Admittedly, it probably needs more than thirty seconds of workshopping to get the flow.)

Didn't get the gig? That's your fault.

My personal bias?

Resumes and candidates have gotten crappier across the board over the years.

(And, yes, I do mean "candidates have gotten crappier", not "candidates behavior has gotten crappier". The latter abstracts accountability from the infractor, and the former let's it land where it belongs -- Behavior doesn't define a person, but is a reflection of who that person already is.)



I've found all of this to be far, far worse in the acting and video game worlds.

So, while I don't agree with all of the points in this slide deck (some are distinctly legacy), there are some good tips here -- Even if you're not a recent college grad. And probably especially if you think none of this applies to you.

Part of the glut of sub-par submissions is an overall societal decline in personal accountability, and a correlative increase in a sense of entitlement & arrogance (which is invalid anyway, but especially for new entrants who haven't earned anything, and for long-time, experienced folks who who are lazy and don't bust their ass daily to stay relevant).


I know these industries -- I'm a professional actor and a video game studio owner.

At times, I get so blindingly frustrated with the amateur behavior of things like assistants to casting directors, agents, and managers who can't manage people or events to a clock, or non-experience folks who want to get into the game industry, but have done no research, or passionately chased their own development projects.

A while ago, I sat across the table from a guy who I'd coached for an entry level position interview at another company. He didn't get the gig, didn't do any of the things I suggested as prep, and he blamed not getting the job on "nepotism", "unfair bias", and "them not seeing how great I am".

"I see the problem," I said. "You're a lazy, self-absorbed jerk who doesn't want to contribute positively to people outside of yourself. That's on you."

(His response was I have unreasonable expectations for people. I really wish I could say this was a unique sit-down event.)

Anyway, as a bonus, these slides' retro-50s visual juxtaposition and tongue-in-cheekedness is fun, too.

http://theundercoverrecruiter.com/graduates-lose-out-jobs/

Aaron Eckhart On Working With Heath Ledger

Not much I could say to add to the awesome of this. Simple and inspiring.

 

The Film Industry Needs the vFX Industry (and Everyone Else)

So, there's a recent current kerfluffle about the role of visual effects studios in successful films, problems with the viability of vFX studios due to hyper-competitiveness, and multiple other related and tangential issues.

I had planned to start (what I hoped was) a balanced, transparent discussion of just how complicated this thing really is, dig into the usury business model that contributes to it (not limited just to film), the pros and perils of unionizing, and so on.

But then I thought, "Well, this isn't just about visual effects -- We actually need everyone involved in making films."

Everyone.

(Remember the writer's strike? That was painful, and 6 years later, as just one side effect, we're still saddled with the overabundance of reality TV that is not reality, but is very much a bulk of our TV.)

Visual effects isn't just about Life of Pi or Star Trek. It's Amour and Lincoln (and Lincoln (and Lincoln)) and Django Unchained and Silver Linings Playbook and ...

... and ...

... and, well, all of them.

Visual effects are there in so many movies to more or less "obviousness", and outside of the "vFX CGI blockbusters" (and I'd argue, even within them), good effects are like good voice acting and good music and good acting and good everything that's solid and well-implemented and if you choose to step back and take the time you say, "That's amazing" but if you don't step back you don't notice their teh awesumz because well-done stuff doesn't get in the way.

But this is already going long, so to make the point, I offer you Exhibit A:

This was my attempt at an explosion. But it looks like a misshapen starfish. Or radiating sperm. Or an exploding misshapen starfish radiating sperm.

I need the professionals who do this ****. I don't want that art missing from The Art. (And I don't want untrained uninitiates like me breaking the fourth wall with our awful.)

Need more? I offer Exhibit B:

Zomigosh, I need vFX and wardrobe and makeup and writers and directors and grips and gaffers and composers and audio designers and editors and producers and DPs and ADs and casting agents and set decorators and storyboard artists and art directors and craft services and audiences and the dozens of other disciplines that are probably going to get a hold me for leaving them out of this knowingly abbreviated list.

Hey, despite my love of and belief and participation in independent film, that doesn't mean I'm ever out there solo without other passionate, talented folks who mesh with my passion and talent as we all drive to something greater than I can do by myself. In a vacuum. Without visual effects.

(You do not want that.)

Problematic Comic Book Costumes

(From left-field.)

4-year-old: Black Widow sure can do a lot in high heels.

7-year-old: Yeah, a lot a lot.

9-year-old: Yeah.

4-year-old: Like Kicking and shooting.

7-year-old: And Running and jumping.

9-year-old: And it's not even good for your feet to wear high heels all of the time and never take them off.

(Totally girls. Totally comic book fans.)

The Anniversary of Ongoing Grief

I've had a lotta angry dreams the past few nights.

It's a stage of grief I'm all too familiar with; I really don't like it.

Today marks one year since losing my mom-in-law, seventeen days after she was diagnosed with cancer.

In some ways, the anniversary is harder than the actual death. There's not the shock and numbness that in some ways lessen the pain. During the event, there is sometimes a flock of present, similarly grieving family and friends who help carry the burden. There's administrivia and to-dos for funeral arrangement and estate details. There's sometimes the muddiness of dealing with the fractured relationships of the living, the regret of things not done, things not said (though we were blessed with very little of any of that).

A year later, the reminder, the pain, is there -- but not the layers of distraction that blunted it before.

"It's not better yet, why won't this pain go away" is fighting against the "I don't want ever to stop missing her".

I have this reverse entitlement of feeling like I don't have as much right to grieve, because it's not my mom I lost. There's a feeling of hopeless helplessness of my being wired to fix things, but I'm not able to fix this for my beloved wife, or for my best friend brother-in-law.

I'm frustrated wondering if the only reason I'm feeling all of this is purely psychological. I know the date, and preemptively I know remembering is going to suck. Maybe I'm just getting myself spun up  "unnecessarily."

Maybe it's just trigger events that remind me of the grief. Last year, we watched snippets of the Superbowl from a cramped hospital room during our final watch, and that's really changed what the game means to me for now, and I was dreading it this year.

Maybe it's just some big cyclical physical rhythm that needs to work itself out in human beings.

Or maybe we're all innately spiritual creatures, and our souls have elastic memories that pull toward each other for these kinds out losses.

Regardless.

Today is a day I remember a neat, neat woman. An example for me, for the daughter and wonderful wife she helped raise, and for the grandchildren who were the light of her recent times with us.

She was a giving, service-oriented woman.

So today was about staying home, not doing day job stuff, and doing what I could for my wife, with the kids and me telling each other stories about Grandma.

Which included, among other things, tales of swimming and Tic-Tacs, dog training and movie nights.

She is a neat, neat woman.

Google Voice transcript of a pocket dial

Google Voice is really cool and useful for me.

It's also occasionally hilarious as it tries to transliterate incoming voice mail.

Today, someone accidentally pocket-dialed me.

Here's the first (innocuous) part of the transcript:

"How, hey. Why don't they. I don't know how the bye people. Hey, give me a only, okay. Hey Joe of. I will talk to you soon. No Cleaning. Yay. Goodbye alright call bye here. Hey Nothing getting here. Have a great day. Bye. Allow and dinner. Yeah. Okay bye. He has a cellphone, hey all that what's going on, and I could go. But hey in it, or Yahoo. Com. Hey, bye bye everything you bye bye that weird looks like we're here, hey. Ohh. Hello, blah blah blah blah blah. Her bye bye, hey. But hey, some other things. Hope things are going to you later. Bye, it's, hey i love you, hey baller. Bye. You Okay bye. Peace. But if you can, hey hey. The. Hey, and and Yeah, it was. Hey, ohh bye. Hello. Hey, hi this is Yeah, hey."

Then, **** gets dark:

"You know you are you. Hello. Hi, Just wondering, reply. I wonder if I had a death wish today. I did not have a lot. Hey, so I will not work."

I think my phone has issues. And is projecting...

Parenting and Accountability

People who know me know I'm pretty keen on personal accountability -- for myself, and for other people.

Those same folks know I don't have to know you to hold you accountable.

I'll be professional, I'll be constructive, but if you are doing something blatantly untoward in public, it's totally possible I'll chat with you about it. Society's arguably in a bit of a nosedive, and I'd argue societal character disorder is at least in part at play.

 My kids know this, too. Sometimes, that bites me.

Last night, I was helping my 4-year-old with something she really should be able to do on her own. I stopped what I was doing, briefly helped her, then went back to what I was doing.

"Daaaa-dy!"

"What, Hon?"

"You didn't do it right."

"Look, Sweetie, it's not my job to do this for you."

"Yeah, but it is your job to do the part you said you'd help me with right!"

(Dammit.)

She's totally right.

Note to self: Avoid transparent half-assery.

Can't change the past ...

There is no going back to the past, jacking with the timestream, stopping John Wilkes Booth, keeping Pa Kent from having a heart attack, or avoiding the Butterfly effect.

There's just dealing with what did happen, and doing something about it and your life from right now onward.

So if you're reading this now, sitting in the dark in you're underwear in your lame-ass wannabe version of the Batcave, put on your Big Boy pants, nut up, do what you already know needs to be done, and get past all the bull***t self-talk you've used to justify your flaccid inactivity.

Nothing you do defines your value, or adds or detracts one iota from who you are at the core.

How you react to what's done to you says volumes about your character, and who you really, really are.

Pixar’s 22 Rules of Storytelling (for me)

So,

Pixar’s 22 Rules of Storytelling

has been making the rounds (a la @lawnrocket).

Rather than just pass the link for the list on to people (but do read it), here's a bit o' commentary.

It's great for storytellers, videogame developers, actors, and people (at least).

The ones that resonated with me?

7, 8, 10, 13, 16

7. Come up with your ending before you figure out your middle. Seriously. Endings are hard, get yours working up front.

(As an actor, it's about knowing what I want, not how I get there; how I get there will change. Repeatedly. For gaming, figuring out the end and how it can change lets me create a whole bunch of fun for the Player before they get there.)

8. Finish your story, let go even if it’s not perfect. In an ideal world you have both, but move on. Do better next time.

(I get stuck in trying to get it "right" when I'm trying to do [anything]. People are beautiful and flawed. So are genuinely interesting characters. Some of my favorite games are far from perfect, and off the popular radar. "Breakdown". "Enslaved". "D&D Heroes".)

10. Pull apart the stories you like. What you like in them is a part of you; you’ve got to recognize it before you can use it.

(Same advice I got years ago from one of my acting coaches, Stephen Prince, and helped me recognize not just what was important to my acting craft, but to me as a human being. Identifying and tearing apart those specific bits of "Dead Poets Society", "The Iron Giant", "The Secret of NIMH", "The Dark Knight", "Say Anything" and other films that resonated with me was a pretty big growth moment for me.)

13. Give your characters opinions. Passive/malleable might seem likable to you as you write, but it’s poison to the audience.

(Acting, writing, gaming, or otherwise being. Boring is boring.)

16. What are the stakes? Give us reason to root for the character. What happens if they don’t succeed? Stack the odds against.

(Consequences are funny thing. "Make it matter" seems obvious, but living it and trying to do something with it is something else. Rising to it is something else still. In fiction. And in just trying to live.)

How YOU can be successful

OK. I have concrete steps for how you (specifically, you) can be successful in life.

I don't care what you do. Or where you are. Averaged over your life, this will work for you.

1. Do the work you are supposed to be doing
2. Don't avoid the work you are supposed to be doing
3. Don't be an ass while doing the work you are supposed to be doing. (Actually, just don't be an ass.)
4. If you are not doing #1, but are doing #2, and/or #3, don't lie about any of it. We know. Everyone knows. And we tell each other. About you. (It's not gossip; it's consequence for your bad behavior.)

And yes, this is motivated by a handful of recent events with severely broken individuals operating at a shockingly bad sub-professional level, a brief personal historical assessment of similar folks, and admittedly my nigh pathological, idealistic desire to hold people accountable to do the right thing (I know, I know -- it's on them, but ...).

We all hold our reputations in our hands. I am amazed at the arrogance and character disorder of people who think that truth doesn't apply to them.

(You're welcome.)

Elaine Frances Tirabassi (1946-2012)

AUDIO: Elaine Frances Tirabassi (1946-2012)

(Here's the text of the obituary, but please listen to the audio.)

ROUND ROCK, Texas — Elaine Frances Tirabassi (1946-2012), 65, went to be with Jesus Feb. 6, 2012, after a brief struggle with leukemia. She was surrounded by her family.

Born in Brighton, Mass., she was the daughter of the late Florence and Clifford Johnson.

Elaine was a model of wisdom, godly submission, discipline and sacrifice. She was a deeply dedicated and caring friend. Elaine was a loving spouse and helpmate for 40 years, before losing her husband, Victor Wallace Tirabassi, in 2009.

Elaine is survived by her children and their spouses Dan & Kate Tirabassi, Joanne & Adam Creighton, & Anthony Tirabassi; her six lovely grandchildren Kiera, Gianna, Isabella, Carina, Gavin, & Joshua; her siblings Bob Johnson, Marjorie Bollino, and Paul Johnson.

In lieu of flowers, the family is asking donations are made to: Campus Crusade for Christ International, Staff #: 0372883, 100 Lake Hart Drive, Orlando, FL 32832

Netflix, Redbox, Blockbuster, and Amazon

My last post inspired me to switching gears to be bit crazy.

That last post was about the Kindle Fire as a perfectly viable physical and distribution platform.

But I also like the potential disruptive models, and weird (but still possible) business scenarios that get me what I want as a consumer.

I've written before about Redbox buying Vudu and Blockbuster, Netflix buying Redbox, Amazon buying Netflix, and there being an explosion of content for Amazon (though not as much as people think; Amazon really does OK, and there's a high overlap in Hulu/Redbox/Prime Instant Videos), and an Amazon Netflix rental DVD distribution (which they might or might not keep), and "Amazon Redbox" stations everywhere.

Part of this has already happened, as Netflix bought those blue rental kiosks at Walmarts everywhere. Then (in case you missed it) Coinstar (the company who owns Redbox), bought NCR for $100MM. NCR operates things like ATM machines, point of sales and retail systems, airline check-in systems, and Blockbuster Express branded kiosks. 

Coinstar's purchase of NCR (to be finalized quarter 3 of this year, if it's not considered anti-regulatory) includes DVD kiosks, "certain retailer contracts", and DVD inventory -- Giving Netflix a bunch of additional distribution points and product. 

That's after the Verizon and Redbox announced a physical and streaming agreement, that's going to make things real challenging for Netflix (and maybe Amazon streaming).

That Verizon / Redbox streaming competition makes things harder for Netflix, but maybe it makes them more applicable for an Amazon partnership (who obviously has the bigger market cap).

One of my big frustrations with streaming media is having to go to multiple sources to get content, and/or a lack of compelling new content (Netflix), or content expiring sooner than I can watch it (Hulu). I actually think an explosion of streaming options could be a good thing, as licensors can charge less (say, 30% of what they do for "just Netflix", license out to multiple streaming sources (4 to n), and make a lot more money, and be on whatever streaming solution to which I want to subscribe as a consumer. 

Going back to Amazon, as a consumer, I'd be fine if that scenario worked out somewhere that way (consolidated acquisition or more of the same content across multiple streaming services. Add scenarios where Amazon has an Xbox 360 media app. And buys Gamefly. That would give me my movie / book / music / gaming fixes in the same purchase / rent / stream / physical or digital model that I want, all in the same consumer-oriented ecosystem, whether I get it from my PC, phone, tablet, or game console.

Like I said, crazy. And I'm intentionally ignoring a lot of stuff. But not myopically. 

(Quick aside about relative market caps and aggressive partnership: Netflix is about 6x the market cap of Coinstar, but I'd argue Coinstar is being more intelligently aggressive in their partnerships and acquisitions. Netflix does stuff like the failed Quickster fiasco, and buying the DVD.com domain.)

The Kindle Fire, official Google tablets, and bad assessments from "experts"

I was reading an article, "Why Amazon Can't Win a Tablet Price War Against Google" (the title is basically the premise).

At first, I thought, "there are some good points here."

Moments later, that turned into, "WTF? This is ridiculous and invalid.

The article had some good points, but seems to be ignoring a lot, and overall, it's a poor article.

To be honest, I think the author was trying to center around the semi-clever analogy, "the Fire is just another box for Amazon", and intentionally or myopically left stuff out.

He ignored low-level things like Amazon is doing away with boxes (shipping items in their own packaging), and higher level things like their ridiculously successful digital distribution (their Prime subscribers, their hundreds per month $5 MP3 albums, Prime Instant Videos, etc.).

Then there's Amazon's cloud storage (consumer and enterprise S3), their negative inventory business model, the fact the business is built around making their money per transaction, etc.

And while this particular author says it's not sustainable to lose money on the manufacture of each device, it is when it's amortized across the business (think the Xbox and Xbox 360 business unit growth and P/L distribution across quarters and other business units under Microsoft's digital entertainment umbrella).

He claims the loss on manufacture of the Fire is between $10 to $70, which tells me he doesn't understand what the loss is, and is discounting reduction of manufacturing cost over time as components become far cheaper (economies of scale, efficiencies in manufacture, successive technologies, etc.) -- again, the Xbox / 360 growth is an example of that.

Also, Acer and Asus -- tablet providers he classifies as "Companies that are in the tablet hardware business only" "that sell tablets for profit" -- sell tablets for $199 (for a profit; they're not loss-leaders, which wouldn't work in this context). Amazon can easily do likewise.

And then there's just flat out odd stuff he says in the article -- like

"Any discount retailer, from Wal-Mart to Costco, has to make it up on volume. But Amazon can't."

Really? Amazon is an online discount retailer that's perfected the Dell negative-inventory distribution model. Of course they can make it up by volume.

As far as dogging the subsidy model (Amazon allegedly subsidizing manufacturing loss), think the handset carrier analogy (which is a perfectly sustainable model). The Fire is analogous to the handset, Prime to the phone service, and Amazon purchases are the way-higher-margin-than-microtransaction purchases.

This is not to discount Amazon having some serious competition from Google, and it's possible official tablets.

But Amazon's foremost advantage may be it genuinely has a product portfolio mindset, which is something -- to be frank -- Google struggles with. As a concrete example, I pitched an all-ecosystem offering to the stakeholders for each of the ecosystem pieces, and the people I talked to seemed genuinely confused and/or uninterested in its combinatorial value-add across the ecosystem (outside of their individual piece). Pitching the same concept to some other "ecosystem-type partners" blew their socks off, and there's a mad scramble from them to snag it and make it happen in some form or fashion.

Second, Amazon could open their Fire platform. Right now, the Fire is a semi-locked Android tablet, which turns a lot of people off (myself included, but not enough to keep me from buying one). Amazon could open the Fire up to a "legit" version of Android, and become a partner for Google's ecosystem, and make the device more appealing to more folks.

Amazon could make some content free or cheaper on the Fire, and charge more on other platforms. They could do the Microsoft Windows Phone model (Halo ATLUS, Kinectimals, Xbox Live app), and make the Kindle, Prime, and related apps free on the Fire, and charge for the other versions (or make them free on both, but feature-richer on the Fire).

So that's probably enough about the Fire and that myopic business assessment.