Bittersweet ...

Tonight was a "good tough" kind of Meisner night. Really intense, really emotional, really important.

Afterwards, it was a brief spin through The Gingerman's draft offerings in the first social get together (most of) the class has had. Has it really taken this long for our Meisner group to do something social together? Was it really every week at The Gingerman while I worked at FailedTechStartup?

My Meisner fellows so rock. Just talented and beautiful and engaging. I have never been in a class where I've felt everyone is so together on the acting front, so interesting on the personal front, the guys are so "bro", and the girls are so amazingly different and uniquely gorgeous. Take it for what it is.

But then it was a long ride home alone in the rain, which tends to make introspective.

Yes, tonight in class was tough, and it was good tough. But why do I feel last week and this that everything in the world won't be OK until I throw up, and I don't throw up so everthing in the world isn't OK?

I don't know why I freaking keep trying to figure this stuff out. It's not dissectable, and I just need to move on after the tough -- good or bad.